As we consider the television landscape of the past year, a handful of shows stand out not for their brilliance, but for their notable shortcomings. From awkward spin-offs to confusingly bad documentaries, here are the productions that had us scratching our heads or just reaching for the remote.
Where to begin with this divisive follow-up? Plagued with dreadful writing, painful arcs (we demand better for Miranda!), and a paltry 71 seconds of beloved Samantha, the series struggled to justify its existence. Briefly, as the third season started, it looked like it had at last hit its stride. Then came an installment all about Seema’s natural deodorant. No wonder the showrunner announced this would be the final season. It ended on a bum note; the closeup of Miranda’s toilet flooded with poo was simply too on-the-nose. Yet, viewers certainly had a hoot dissecting every single “what on earth?” episode. And as Carrie – once again single – danced around her palatial townhouse to Barry White, who couldn't let out a small sob?
‘Is Kim Kardashian an actress? Of course she can’t.’
But that was almost the least of this show's issues. The subject of a very rare no-star review, it was hard to know where to begin listing the flaws. The hilariously leaden dialogue? The tedious glorification of affluence and consumption? The almost wilful procession of tropes? Performances so bad they felt borderline spiteful? Suffice it to say “each and every one” and never speak of this show again. Except, a new season has been ordered, so we’re probably going to have to.
Considering the legal troubles, abuse allegations and fatherly shortcomings, it’s fair to say Charlie Sheen has been a bad boy. Not you’d really have gleaned it from this multi-part docuseries which chuckled along at Sheen’s various episodes of reckless excess while failing to tell us anything we didn’t already know. Instead, it felt as if this loose cannon was being indulged, so any sympathy this series might evoke should be saved for the people who have had to endure close contact with this charismatic but flippant egotist.
Of course we knew it was preposterous from the get-go: a thriller about a supercomputer known as Charlie Big Potatoes that could either solve global crises – or destroy all of humanity. We persevered out of sheer love for its leads … but by the end, it felt like even they had stopped bothering. One barely cared when his character died, and the other ended up slicing Charlie with an axe … in painfully slow-motion. Talk about admitting defeat.
Shady characters convening in empty boxing gyms? The Prodigy’s Firestarter jackhammering away in club scenes? The late 90s called and demands its crime drama back.
In truth, that is harsh on the gangland dramas of the late 90s. Many look a little old-fashioned now, but at least they didn’t endure the ignominy of having to indulge baffling accents. But there were plenty of other issues. Mainly that it was just really boring; a dispute over drug-selling territory between various London picaresques which felt rather simplistic.
Given the extent to which she grinds the gears of certain ostentatiously enraged commentators, it’s almost tempting to applaud the Duchess of Sussex’s televised ventures into quaint homemaking as deliberate statements. But then you view them and are compelled to concede that actually, they may have a point. It’s like watching a homeware catalogue animated; a meme for evening drinks with delusions of grandeur; a procession of sleeping dogs, humming beehives, sentimental platitudes and pointless crafting “tips” you’ll forget instantly. All underpinned by immense, largely unearned wealth. Ugh.
There are clearly interesting things to be discussed about both Victoria Beckham and her struggles with career, self-image, self-worth. But for some reason, this three-part series chose not to say them. Rather, the experience was like consuming a marketing brochure. She clearly has good reason to resent what she describes as her “stern” image. But sadly, she failed to do herself any helps with this cagey non-event of a series.
It had the potential to be the next big hit – except even more extravagant, with a famous star playing dead and a well-known personality overseeing her inheritance. What more could you want? As players battled it out, there was plenty of betrayal and arguing. But the rules quickly became bewildering: it’s even now too complicated to detail what precisely was happening. Even more regrettably, we only saw brief appearances of the star via filmed videos. The show ended up reeking of a production that was trying way too hard to emulate something way beyond it.
How do you follow a show that defined a generation? The pressure was immense for this starry romcom about Jessica, a hopeful New Yorker who lands in London with a broken heart. The star seized the opportunity by the horns and was a delight to watch, reveling in Jane Austen levels of romantic ideals. But it was all very slick and, paradoxically, was insufficient. Plus, the sheer amount of celebrity friends involved felt icky.
Not good enough to be ‘uneven’.
Given the shrewd recruitment of gifted emerging comics, hopes were high. But sadly, most of it fell flat. A recurring sketch was a single joke milked to a dry pulp but recurring in every episode. One star seemed too willing to slip into a familiar irate mode. The writing room sketches, meanwhile, simply provoked the thought that they should probably have remained in there a bit longer.
This dramatisation of the story of Amanda Knox was executive produced by Amanda Knox and pretty much exclusively presented the viewpoint of Amanda Knox. So, while there undoubtedly is an interesting drama to be made about the horrific 2007 murder, this was not it. The material needed to be handled with care. Rather, the series struggled painfully to find the right voice, lumbering from strangely breezy, slightly stylised farce to ultimately, real-life horror. Complex? Arguably. A complete mess? Absolutely.
We admire the star … but did we buy him playing the most brilliant maths genius since, a man so smart he’s on the verge of a discovery that could ruin society? Nope! This globe-trotting thriller about secret services spying on – and eliminating – intellectuals frankly got more farcical by the second. Formulaic nonsense.
This uncritical portrait followed the online personality notorious for sexual exploits as she undertook her biggest challenge yet. What on earth would motivate her? What we craved was far greater examination of her actual psychology, plus those of the men in the line. They could at least have spoken to the now-famous mum who appeared to drag her son out of the queue. What we got was horrific shots and absolutely no critical analysis of her infamy whatsoever. And to think, the documentary-maker has a young daughter too.
A tech analyst and business strategist with over a decade of experience in global markets, specializing in digital transformation and innovation.
